Do you ever cry because your heart can’t handle any pain your kids may go through. Do you ever cry because you know how difficult it is to grow up, no matter how much love and support you have…those years are so hard. Everyone will go through hardships. Everyone will have let downs. Everyone will get hurt. But do you ever cry because you don’t want your kids to have to go through any of that, when you you know it’s part of growing up, you know you have to get knocked down to climb back up, you know the little things they will think are devastating will seem so small and minuscule when they are older.
Yet you cry for them. You cry when you see them pushing their small bodies through exhaustion to do something they love, wondering if they are missing out on their childhood. You cry when kids say harsh words to them. You cry when they don’t get picked.
You cry because even though you had such a blessed and amazing life, you remember how emotional and trying those growing up years were. You remember crying in your room writing horrific poetry that probably would have had your mother calling a psychologist. You remember how it felt to be the very last one picked every singe day in gym class…just pleading with God that you would be second last picked instead of last. You remember the anxiety having to run through a shower naked as the only girl who didn’t have boobs yet or wore bras. You remember someone standing up in class and labeling everyone…pointing at you and saying “loser”. You cry because you remember squeezing your own neck so hard it bled. You cry because you couldn’t have had a more loving and supportive environment, but you still went through it. They all go through it. And no matter what you do, you probably can’t prevent your kids from going through it.
You cry because you just want them to see the bigger picture NOW. You want them to see it from a different perspective, how strong they will become, how overcoming all these little challenges will make them into something amazing, how they will be the ones to rise to the top, how crazy amazing and beautiful life really is.
You’ll be strong for them. You’ll teach them to be strong. You’ll teach them that God has them here for such a big purpose.
But when they aren’t looking, do you ever cry?